Sales Pitch

“Sir” called out a young lad from the morning mist. The morning joggers sniffed at him amd moved on thinking about new policies in the walkers’ park.

“Sir , kindly give me two minutes.” requested the young lad to a slow-paced walker.

Mohan, likes to walk slow. Period.

There is a theory amongst his friends that, if there was a landslide, he would let the debris run over him rather than running.

“To smell the roses or  stinking socks.” preaches Mohan to anyone who asks about his liking slow paced walking.

“Yes young man. What can I do for you?” asked Mohan curiously looking at the strange attire of the young  lad in question.

He wore a bowler hat, bow-tie and pink shoes.

“It’s more of what these two minutes can do for you, sir.” cherrily replied Shyam-the young lad.

“Cut to the chase please.”

“Ok sir, have you ever dreamt of walking on lake?”

“Not particulary, you see lakes are throwing toxic fumes off-late.”

“Er…ever dreamt of flying on broomstick?”

Mohan already irritated by the morning KBC round, snapped, “Nah…I prefer airplanes with seat belts. And whats the point of broom if its not used for cleaning??”


“Listen before you ask other stupid questions about weird walking or flying habits, let me tell you that I prefer walking on solid ground and at a slow pace.” finished Mohan with a look he reserves for Ussain Bolt.

“Bingo!!! You are in a luck sir. For I dont have a broomstick that flies or slippers that float on water. All I have is these shoes that would make you walk slowly.” and he produced a pink colored shoes form the brown bag behind the lamppost (which is in need of repainting.)

Mohan at first closed his eyes in agony and then bulged his eyes in pure surprise that something as heinous as these are produced by humans in current world.

“WOW man thats something man.”

“Yes right…its called duckers.”

“Unbelieveable!!” Mohan muttered still in stupor.

“Yes right!!!” Shyam seconded chirpily, ” And the price is just Rs. 2000.”


“Yes I would say its a good bargain. You can feel it sir, look at the green glitters at the left side that was slashed with red squares.”

Mohan took the shoe and  looked at the mentioned pattern and sighed silently.

“So sir, if you tell your name, I would make the bill and give you free coupon which you can redeem like in next 20mins in a shopping mall at the other end of city.”

“You said something?” Mohan asked coming back to reality. He was still taking time to adjust his sight to things of beauty like butterlfies, crows and roses.

“Your name and mode of payment.”

“And may I ask you the motivation for your sudden curiosity for my name?”

“Well, to make a bill one needs your name.”

“Bill for what?”

“For the duckers sir, the one you are holding in your hands.” replied Shyam a bit perturbed by the slow pace thinking of Mohan.

Mohan smiled and gave back the duckers to Shyam.

“Hard Luck kid.”


“You heard me, I have eyes.”

“But sir, I thought you liked them.”

“Well, you misunderstood me.”

“You were muttering amazing and other superlatives.”

“That’s my reaction when I see antimatter. See you around the block champ.” and Mohan parted the ways with Shyam stil wondering about the makers of those shoes and their inspiration to complete the task till the end.

Shyam shrugged and packed back the duckers into the bag.

“Hey young man.”

“Sorry the shop is closed.”

“I am not here to buy but to make you sell.”

“Apologies sir but I am not in a mood for some more cloberring in morning.”

“Exactly thats my point.”

“Beg your pardon?”

“You see I work with Police and handle interrogation. Currently, I am having tough time in making criminals spill the beans.”

“Why would you want to spill the beans?”

“That’s an expression you dimwit.”

Shyam controlled from my saying that his name is Shyam but went on with dimwit.

“What am I saying? Yes, so I have observed that effect these shoes…”


“Sorry! You said something?”

“No sir, please continue.”

“And I got this idea that of using them in our interrogation.”

Shyam was unable to believe his ears. He was hearing a symphony by Bach and Mozart.

“Give me the full load and how much does it cost?”

“Each pair Rs 2000 sir, with a free coupon that can be redeemed in next 10mins in a shopping mall that is yet to open.”

“Forget the coupon. Give me all the pairs.”

“I just have two pairs sir, the production stopped after that. Workers made claims about their basic human rights or something.”

“I get their point.” smiled the man.


Two weeks later………………


“Well well look who we have here.” beamed the interrogator.

“Whom do we have?” asked Mohan with trepidation. He was arrested on charges of conspirator for a bomb blast (which never happened due to cheap iron quality used in making bomb), for he was the only one who didn’t run when the old man on street pointed at bomb.

“We have you my dear and you have me , the Yama.”

“That’s a weird name to have, Yama.”

“Tut tut , that’s not my name. That’s actually usage of…forget it…tell me about the bomb and it’s relation to you.”

“I dont know anything about the bomb. I always walk slowly, there is this theory that if a landslide….”

“Cut the cud Mr.Mohan. Tell me about the bomb like a good boy else I should be forced to use my weapon.”

“Sir I really dont know about bombs. I was walking back from park ….”

“Well well..if you stick to your story…” slyly smiled interrogator and picked up a bag that is stamped with several skulls and bones.


“No not these things again , please!!!!!! I confess to every crime in world but pleas dont show me these again.”


“Darling everything has a place in this world.” reflected Shyam after seeing the news about the new instrument that arrested a terrorist.

“What are you talking about?” asked Padma who was busy counting the waves.

“It’s all a matter of sales pitch and presentation.”

“Forty two ..forty…you were saying something dear?”




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